Does this mean anything to you:

“The promise of reform which the Green Paper heralds holds much for the public and Service alike; local policing, customised to local need with authentic answerability, strengthened accountabilities at force level through reforms to police authorities and HMIC, performance management at the service of localities with targets and plans tailored to local needs, the end of centrally-engineered one size fits all initiatives, an intelligent approach to cutting red tape through redesign of processes and cultures, a renewed emphasis on strategic development so as to better equip our service to meet the amorphous challenges of managing cross force harms, risks and opportunities.”

Me neither!  I can only think that the writer did it as a joke!

This 102 word sentence is part of a response to the Government’s Green Paper on policing from the the Association of Chief Police Officers.

Marie Claire, spokeswoman for the Plain English Campaign, which lobbies for better and clearer use of words, said whoever drafted the paper should “hang their head in shame”.

She said:

“What excuse is there for this single sentence? It is 102 words long. I fell asleep halfway through and consequently did not have cause to ponder upon the meanings of “centrally-engineered one size fits all initiatives” or “amorphous challenges” – that is wrestling with a jellyfish, right?

“This is ridiculous. What are ACPO doing? Who are they trying to kid? I have got qualifications, I understand language, but I cannot understand this.

“By using this sort of language they are doing their own police officers a discredit.”

She said the sentence has been entered in this December’s Golden Bull competition and stands a good chance of winning the prize.

Does anyone have any other examples of “Golden Bull”?